The Test with No Wrong Answers.

Y’all… I just spent a good five minutes trying to decide if I capitalized my title correctly. I’ve been grading too many papers.

ANYWAY. Here is a life update: I am married and teaching high school! Everything I’ve ever wanted.

Spongebob and Squidward work the graveyard shift.

Spongebob and Squidward work the graveyard shift.

We have two cars, a lovely apartment, two beautiful babies(fish)***, I have a great job that I love, even with all of its challenges. Up until a couple weeks ago, my husband had a pretty good job too. But then: (cue dramatic music) he gets laid off. It wasn’t exactly ideal timing. I was just getting ready to start buying Christmas presents and ugly sweaters (see previous blog posts about how much I love Christmas). But, such is life.

So, like the responsible and industrious man that he is, my husband starts filling out job applications like crazy. He finally got a couple of interviews and then last night, a call! He has a job! But here’s the thing. It’s a graveyard shift. Basically I’ll get home for work just in time to kiss him goodbye and vice versa.
weddingNow. In case you had forgotten, we are only newly married. We haven’t even been at this for three months yet. I still want him to go jean shopping with me because I can’t stand to be apart (which of course, he loves). So the schedule of his new job is, of course, disconcerting to me. Since finding out, I have tried so hard to be supportive and positive. The job will allow us to have a lot more financial freedom than before. God has blessed us tremendously in that regard. But you know what? I’d rather have my husband home with me at night.

It’s a difficult place for me emotionally, because we have all been praying so hard for Kai to get a job. God was gracious enough to keep us afloat financially in the mean time. And our prayers were answered with this job offer. The answer just isn’t what I want it to be. God’s provision doesn’t look like I want it to. I was prepared for us to take a financial hit from a new job. Not a time-with-my-new-husband hit.

In my prayer time, I’m having a hard time not being ticked at God. Why can’t the answer be something I was prepared for? Why can’t I sacrifice something that I was already ready to give up? But in this, I realize: God’s plan is sovereign and perfect and I need to get my butt on board with it. God has been so faithful to us in our new marriage. We are beyond blessed. This is the first time that we even have to face something legitimately difficult.


I’ve had this verse on a note in may car for the last couple of months:

Bless the Lord, O my soul,
    and forget not all his benefits! Psalm 103:2

I have to remember to not just praise Him when everything is lovely. The challenge is only temporary; God is permanent. It’s like my favorite preacher (my dad) said on Sunday: God is teaching us to trust him when the miracle provision stops. I’m so glad I serve a faithful God.

Well, since I’m about to have a lot of free time while my husband works, more posts to follow 🙂

That is all.


*** One of our fish died last night. RIP, little buddy. Miss you forever.


8 thoughts on “The Test with No Wrong Answers.

  1. Dear Kayla Nicole, I love the article you wrote. I have been thinking the exact same thing for a while now. I’m just glad someone finally put it to paper. I think you are a wonderfully fun young lady! I’m very happy that you have found your soul mate , the one GOD intended for you alone. I look forward to reading more of your blogs. God Bless you and your husband!😁🎶

  2. hey I understand what you’re saying about the job but you must not ever question gods plan yes he landed a job the financial freedom is coming just because he landed this job doesn’t mean he’s going to stop looking for another one I was out of a job for a year the job that I landed is paying me more money than I’ve ever made but its in the evening I don’t see my children during the week and all of the baseball practices and school pick up some homework and dinner falls on my wife for a while I felt bad guilty and homesick but I know it won’t last forever I needed money so bad and I was complaining so much about being broke and now I’ve been able to catch up save up and the family has gotten used to itit’s so much better than the alternative the unemployment line you guys will be fine just like me and my guys are fine and the time spent together is even that much more valuablegod knows what he’s doing and he’s doing it for a reason you may not know now but the reasons will reveal themselves in due time so ride it outand be grateful because I know a thousand people and new marriages who would love to switch places with you and your husband take care god bless you both

  3. I think God has simply chosen to provide for your needs, but at the same time grow your relationship and make it stronger. The two of you will find a way to make this new change work. Just remember all of the military families that send their loved one away for a year at a time. You’ve got this!

  4. Hi! Just found your blog through FB…(great article btw…as a mother of a 12, 11, and 7 year old, the social media thing is about to become REAL in here!)…anyway, being married for 14 years, and a former teacher myself, I can say it is only the beginning of the trials you two will face, however, it is also the beginning of seeing God in a whole new light. Your world has been pretty predictable previously with you in charge of yourself. Now, you are no longer just you, but two as one, and boy does it become so wonderful and stronger together as you are bonded, but it gets messy, and complicated, and sometimes down right frustrating. Most likely you will add children that just adds to the lack of control and messiness…however when you lose all control…which you are starting to realize (we never really had it anyway), that God becomes a big rock and foundation than ever! The storms get stronger, but so does the anchor. Remember how every time David took his eyes off God, he had trouble, but when he kept his eyes on God, he was kept safe in the storms. Unfortunately, the storms will always come, we have no control, but thankfully we know the one who does! Good job staying positive and knowing he has this under control and it more often than not looks a lot different than we thought it should, but he’s got this and in the end he’s got you both too! Blessings!

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